Daya

hmmm..bck aft so long.. my comp down again.. N also been so sick since last wed… down wit fever but got a day of MC onli..hmmm haven fully recover i got tis stupid mumps.. i was like.. Wat the hack.. everyting came one shot.. but luckily i was on leave on Mon & Tues so i cld really rest.. hmmm.. N i did in fact.. wen for course on wed N Thurs & today mornin shift kinda of tired in fact cos i dun reall like to wake up in the Morin straight few days…hmmm.. dun reall have time for my darlin tis few days cos past few weeks he was busy wit his kompang preparin for NDP @ yishun.. so aft wrk he wil go for his kompang N we meet twice to 3times a week..hmmm.. aft NDP tot cld spend more time but i was wrong.. we meet lesser den i expected.. tis week onli we onli meet on wed.. tat is also aft my course & aft he end wrk @bout 1900hrs..hmm… i dun Noe.. seems like we are meeting lesser each week.. true we chat on the phone everyday but the feelin is diffi wen u talk on the phone N meetin each other u Noe.. if cant we wans to meet everyday but due to certain reasons tat stop use frm doin so.. but its okaY to me as long as he trust me n i trust him is enu.. tat’s is the most important in a relationship rite..okaY lahz.. i shall stop here.. kinda of tired goin to bed have to wrk tomorro..haiz..nitez.. see u wen i see u..hahhaahz..

hey blog.. I’m bck.. my stupid comp down for a week… damn it..hahahz.. wel I’m bck NW.. lots of tings to update in fact..hahhahz… ferstly… hi to rynn… u wanna Noe how am i rite.. wel.. I’m fine wit him..hhahhz.. wait til u read on further den u Noe how am i doin… hahahz… wel.. its been a month wit my beloved darlin..hahahz.. happy being wit him.. hmmm… 1st month anniversary celebration?? hahahz.. wel.. we celebrated on 25/07/05 cos its was my pay day & bonus..hahhaz.. never really celebrate lahz cos I’m wrkin mornin on tat day & my darlin wrkin til 1800hrs… so we decided to meet up @ nite & spend the nite together cos i told him to take off on Tues cos I’m wrkin nite shift on Tues so we can actually spend time overnite.. we wen to East Coast take a stroll down the beach enjoyin the wind..hahhaz.. but for a while onli lahz den we sat inside his van til mornin talkin bout us,our future havin how many kids…hahahz.. i Noe kinda fast but we are not gettin married soon.. not like rynn say next yr.. tats too fast…hahahz..maybe next 3yrs..hahhaz.. duit lum cukup..hahahz.. wel.. I’m jus leavin to ALLAH.. kite cume menrancang tuhan yg menetukan.. kalau ader jodoh khawin kalau tak.. jus accept the fact.. but Wat he promise me tat he wan to live his life wit me til end of his life is true..hope he meant Wat he say.. hahahz.. nak jiwang pulak budak nie..hahhaz… BTW bought him a HUGO BOSS perfume for our ferst month anniversary he was shocked actuall cos he dun expect me to buy him a present which is tat expensive, cos he didn’t not buy me anyting.. but at least he bought me CHOCOLATES..hahhzz my favorites… to me wen i luv someone & wen u buy someting for him money doesn’t matter.. u can always earn bck money but money cant buy u happiness & luv rite… wel.. kinda of miss my darlin cos he lend his hp to his sister & he wont be callin & meetin me til Monday..hmm… I MISS U SYG…. okaylahz gtg tis like 3am in the mornin.. if my darlin Noe i slp tis late.. he gonna kill me…hahhaz but i Noe he wont cos he luv me so much..hahhahz.. nitez… see u wen i see u… i shall update if i have the time soon…

hey.. I’m bck… wel good to be bck again to update ma blog again..hahahz.. busy wit wrk lately.. jus came bck frm wrk.. so tired aft 2days of OT…finally in the midnitez shift tomorro can slp slightly later but must not slp later den 0330hrs as had made a promise to someone not to slp late…hmmm…first of all wanna say hi to rynn..hi..new fren frm esmaco.. not reall new its jus never reall talk much onli recently..thanks to frenster..hahhaz…today kinda of tired wrking cos wrk frm 1230-2200..den yday 0730-1800.. but how tired I’m i stil cant be as tired as ma darlin rite.. but how tired he is stil wanna fetch me frm wrk… told him not to die2 also wan..hmmm..wel..tis few days kind of had a bad dreamz.. tat is ma darlin is engage & his gf took him away frm me.. i hate tis dreamz.. cos whenever i had tis kind of dream it always comes true..happen twice i dun wan it to happen for the 3rd time.. I’m reall tired of cryin & startin a new relationship.. so i told him bout ma dream yday & guess Wat.. he told me the truth.. actuall his family wants him to engage to his ex but he dun wan cos he dun luv & like her any more… N he wont be wit her again even if she reall becomes his wife he wont touch her.. but i dun Noe to believe or not.. i dun Noe.. I’m reall in dilemma.. wen tis happen tot of puttin an end to this relationship bck but wen i tink bck i had gone thru tis far to forget ma ex n to be wit ma darlin.. I’m reall stupid if i reall were put it to an end..no matter Wat happen i Will always by Ur side to support u n give u the courage syg…watever Ur decision is..i Will always luv u… okay lahz got to go tis like 0230hrs.. gota slp NW.. so tired.. shall update soon..

….hmmm…where shd i start… weL… been veri happy wit him for past 2week together.. beginin to luv him more N more.. at first i tot i cant luv him tis much but he prove me wrong…he gave me the courage to accept new tings in life.. N wit his guidance i manage to do it… which i reall need to thank him for tat.. thank u syg..for givin a new life to live for..hehehez…jus hang up the phone wit him N I’m alread missin him so badly..hmmm… but luckily he fetch me frm wrk jus NW if not i Will miss him more..rite syg??? hahahz… I’m jus lost for words NW actually..dun Noe Wat else to say.. but I’m jus simply happy to be wit him… ppL may tink i wont last long wit him as i stiL cant forget ma ex..but.. i shaLL prove it wrong.. i had forget ma ex.. ma syg is the onli one in ma heart..hehehez.. weLL tats aLL for NW..shd update ma blog soon wen I’m frEE..hahhz…

24/06/05… Tat’s the date wen i let go of ma past & accept someone new..someone who had enter in ma life… tat someone none other den ma bf currently.. wel kinda happy with him,even tho wen Noe each other for like Wat 4days..hahahz.. but tat’s doesn’t matter rite..we can Noe more bout each other as time past by… he makes me happy & makin me laugh all the time..hahahz.. wel.. he has everyting i wan in a guy.. Carin,lovin & accept me for Wat i am…tat’s the most important wan…he’s always there to be wit me.. theres sometin i learn is tat its better tat someone luv u den u luvin someone…tat’s all for NW Will update ma blog soon..

While waitin for the time to off duty jus NW..suddenly tink of sometings which i tink happen to me N most of us.. If u TREAT him nicely, he says u are IN LOVE with him,If u Don’t, he says u are PROUD. If u DRESS Nicely, he says u are trying to LURE him,If u Don’t, he says u are from KAMPUNG.If u ARGUE with him, he says u are STUBBORN,If u keep QUIET, he says u have no BRAINS.If u are SMARTER than him, he’ll lose FACE,If he’s Smarter than u, he is GREAT.If u don’t Love him, he tries to POSSESS u,If u Love him, he will try to LEAVE u.If u don’t make love with him,he says u don’t Love him,If u do, he says u are CHEAP.If u tell him your PROBLEM, he says u are TROUBLESOME,If u don’t, he says that u don’t TRUST him.If u SCOLD him, u are like a NANNY to him,If he SCOLDS u, it is because he CARES for u.If u BREAK your PROMISE, u Cannot be TRUSTED,If he BREAKS his, he is FORCED to do so.If u SMOKE, u are BAD girl,If he SMOKES, he is GENTLEMEN.If u do WELL in your exams, he says it’s LUCK,If he does WELL, it’s BRAINS.If u HURT him, u are CRUEL,If he HURTS u, u are too SENSITIVE!! its so true rite..guys dun get offended but I’m jus statin the fact…

its been a long time since i updated ma blog..was busy wit lots of tings.. N finaLL i have time to update today..well startin off wit ma ‘mummy’ which is NOOR AASHINA weddin two weeks bck which is on 05/06/05… I’m her bridesmaid, so its like i have to be at her side every min on tat day.. so its like fun, great experience N exhausted too..but its okay for ma Gd fren I’m willing to do anyting for her… but Wat I’m sad of is some of our fren gets jealous of tis.. i dun  Noe why, but i tot I’m over sensitive but I’m not, tiL one of ma fren notice it n if its not for her, i wld be keepin tis to myself scare tat i wld hurt few of them if i were to be over sensitive, but ma instinct was rite..but why ma fren gets jealous of tis?? i dun reall understand… i didn’t pester  Nana to makes me her bridesmaid,she’s the wan who choose me..i cant reject rite..anywae frens its over NW..so u guys get over it, N treat me per normal…Lookin back @ her looks she was so damn happy..N I’m really happy for her…wen i  see her so happy remind me of someone whom  I’ve always miss.. but too bad we cant be together again…N I’m gonna miss u badly..even aft so long like Wat 1yr had past but to me its like few days…N i will always miss the days we had together… hmmm… anywae.. aft Nana’s weddin rest few days N got to get bck to wrk..had been wrkin N wrkin.. wit onli 1 off day..so tired.. wan  to take leave cant take.. Wat the hack…cant really rest aft tat day…finall today ma off day i can reall rest… tats all for NW… WiLL update ma bLog wen i’m free…

A Friend… is a tissue when you can’t stop crying
A Friend… is a shoulder when you feel like dying
A Friend… always listens when you have something to say, A Friend… is a week when you need a day, A Friend… is a crutch when you have
a brokenheart, A Friend… is some glue when everything falls apart, A Friend… is a sun when the rain just won’t stop, A Friend… is your’mom when you run into a cop, A Friend… is a phone call when you can’t leave your home, A Friend… is a hand when you feel all alone, A Friend… is a wing if you want to fly, A Friend… understands without
knowing why, A Friend… is an ear for a secret to
tell, A Friend… is an aspirin when your
head hurts like hell, A Friend… is a love that can never let go, A Friend… is you,and i wanted you to
know!!
****A friendship between
you ‘n’ me is forever more

"It was not so long ago when I thought I’d never meet someone like you. Wrong was I, thinking I’m in control Believing I’d never fall. All my life I thought no one would melt a heart like mine, a heart so cold, a heart hardened by the past,
protected by shields so vast. Slowly I was falling
without even knowing. Only to find out too late
I have no choice but to accept my fate.
I could dream, I suppose forever, I could hope
there will never be any ‘us’, that’s our
destiny so I wake up to reality.
I lied when I said I didn’t love you, that my feelings for you are through. I lied not because I wanted to
but because I love you and I still do. I wouldn’t do a thing to hurt you but I just have to let go. I can’t hold on much longer ‘coz for us there’s no forever…"

Have you ever been silently in love? With someone you can never have? So close you can touch his/her hand Yet, so far to feel his/her heart? Have you ever lived in pretense Quietly loving without any condition? A feeling of love that’s unknown Hiding it, not knowing for how long… Have you ever fallen deeply Loving the person unconditionally? So afraid to say what you feel Acting normal, keeping things still… Have you ever been hurt unintentionally But put on a smile, pretended to be happy? Deep inside you’re in pain and suffering But outside you’re jolly and laughing… Why does holding his/her hand feel so right? Your heart smiles everytime he/she’s at sight Hearing his/her voice makes your day Hope you can hug him/her in a special way…